In Which the Author Goes on a Book Tour

Several years ago, I visited Youngest Son's second grade class to talk about being a writer. The kids were all impressed about meeting a writer--until one of them asked the question: "Have you written a book?" Um, no. "Really? Don't writers write books?" Well, yes, but I've written all these other things-- "Are you gonna write a book?" Maybe someday, but right now I-- "You haven't written a book?"

Ah yes, the ego-deflating visit to the elementary school. Now I have written a book. And still the ego deflation continues. When I told people I was going to be on TV, the first questions always were: "Do you get your own dressing room? Will they do your makeup?"

No and no. Sigh. And another question comes up: "Are you going to do a book tour?"

Um....

This I could do, albeit on a small scale. I've read about other writers who engage in what's called "guerrilla marketing," in which they go to bookstores, ask to sign copies of their books, make sure the book is face-out on the shelf or on an endcap or on a table. Well! I could do that. So here is the story of the trip I took last week: My Very Own Book Tour!

I was heading to St. Paul and Roseville for work meetings, so I carefully plotted out several bookstores along the way that might carry my book. The first stop was over by the U of M's St. Paul campus, at the wonderful Micawbers:

The first bookstore of the day, and yes! They had my book! And they were happy to have me sign it! Here's the lovely lady who was working that morning, along with myself, both of us happy about signed books:

I wasn't the only author out on a private book tour that morning. Ahead of me at the counter was Pamela Carter Joern, author of The Plain Sense of Things. Here she is, with her book:

The book looked so good I ended up buying it. And maybe another book. And by then it was late morning, and I'd had no coffee, so I went across the street:

Dunn Bros. Coffee and the Finnish Bistro. I bought my java. I also bought a loaf of onion rye bread. Purchases in hand, I gleefully returned to my car, where it occurred to me that this book tour might end up being awfully expensive. I took a moment to remind myself: one does not have to purchase something at every single bookstore one enters. This is completely contrary to my normal method of operation, so it took a few deep breaths, but soon I was off to the next store.

Which didn't have my book. And I was peeved. How could they not have my book? Well. No purchase from me! And I even used the restroom.

But back on the road, it occurred to me: what if they'd had my book, but sold it all out? I should take a kinder mindset towards bookstores that don't have my book in stock.

Traveling down Snelling Avenue, I was caught in hellish traffic, as much of Snelling was torn up and under heavy construction. That meant that even mid-day traffice was awful, made worse by the stoplights every block.

While crawling down Snelling, I passed a Korean restaurant that had a sign out front: "New! Sushi lunch buffet!" While I'm told that some restaurants do this and are very careful about swapping out the sushi frequently, I have to confess this skeeved me out. "Sushi" and "buffet" don't, in my opinion, belong in the same sentence.

Lost in thoughts of good sushi vs. bad sushi, I almost missed my next stop, the Barnes and Noble at HarMar Mall. This is a huge B&N, complete with its own used-book sales area. And bless them--they had several of my books in stock and nicely displayed. This kind woman helped me get them signed and stickered:

We also had a long and spirited discussion on where one can find a decent walleye dinner in Minnesota. This is not as easy as it sounds; walleye might be ubiquitous in MN, but that doesn't mean restaurants always do a decent job of cooking it. She maintained that the Axel's on Grand Avenue in St. Paul is the place to go. Note: she carefully specified the Grand Ave. location--not Woodbury, not Mendota, not Chanhassen. Axel's on Grand is high on my go-to list now. I love good walleye.

So that was a really pleasant stop. I crept back onto Snelling, where traffic had gotten no better. There were no more sushi signs, but I did see an astonishing sight: a teenage girl on a bike, swerving heavily, not paying any attention to traffic because she was texting while biking. Wow.

Finally I reached the last stop of the day:

Border's at Rosedale. Score--they had my books in stock! And were happy to have me sign them. I would have gotten a picture of the nice gentleman who helped me here, who was quite friendly, but just as I was reaching for my camera, he got called away to help some other customers. You know, of the paying variety. I thought that was fair.

This store is in a large suburban mall with plenty of restaurants, and it was lunchtime. I stopped at Big Bowl for some refreshing nutrition:

Thai Green Curry Vegetables and Lemon Ginger Ale. Mmmm.

And there you have it. The exciting, glamorous life of the book author on tour.   

Comments

[Anne Florenzano]

Well, you certainly seem like a bonified, 100% real author to me. I'm glad you found your book in so many spots. I'll look for it the next time I'm out, too!

[Chris]

You know that the next time I see you, it'll be "touch you"! ;)

[Miss T]

You're my hero!! If you need an assistant on your next tour, I'll volunteer!